Also it would be totally awesome if you Dugg me, so that more people would see my site and have an opportunity to use me as a way to venerate their misogyny! And possibly donate or digg themselves! Hurray!
The Arlington, Texas Police Department wants me to give them $782.60 for missing a court date I didn't know existed for punching a girl in the eye my junior year in High School (I'm 19, I'm no longer in school.) "BUT DAVID WHY DID YOU PUNCH A GIRL? DON'T YOU KNOW THAT IT'S WRONG TO PUNCH A GIRL?" Yes. It's also wrong to punch anyone, and punching girls is not especially wrong, because girls are not especially helpless. Females = males. Wow. Imagine that. Equality. So be angry that I punched a person. Don't be angry that I punched a female. There's nothing special about 'em. All people (all other things being the same) equally deserve to not be punched (or attacked in any way, really). So why did I punch her? It's not a very interesting story, sorry to say. I was standing in the hall at school by the cafeteria, and was enjoying a bottle of soda, when a completely random girl walked up to me and started rubbing all over my shoulders and my chest.
"Hey, big boy. I wish there were more hot guys like you in school." Or something to that effect. She was mocking me (I'm fat and unattractive), so I told her straight. "Uh, stop." She ignored me. "Umm...if you don't stop, I'll punch you in your face." She recoiled, "NO YOU WON'T!" in a really shrill tone. "Yes, I will." So I waited like 3 or 4 seconds while she continued, and then I decked her. I didn't really hit her hard, just enough to give her a black eye. She thought she was being funny, but I was not amused, sorry to say. I shouldn't have punched her, I should have just pushed her away and walked somewhere else, but it didn't occur to me. So I didn't. The truth is that I wasn't really interested in dealing with people at the moment so I wasn't really thinking about it. Anyway, she stood there in shock and amazement and I asked her if she was okay and she just continued to stand there and then walked off, so I walked off. This normally wouldn't be a problem if 1) I knew her, 2) she was attractive at all, 3) I wasn't insecure about being touched, and 4) she wasn't condescending to me for her own amusement.
Then some security guard was like, "DID YOU HIT THAT GIRL?" "Sure." "WHY!?" "She was all in my space and I told her to stop and she didn't." "..Well don't do it again." So that was fine and I started to walk away and then the school cop showed up and .. long story short I got three weeks of suspension, was forced to do a semester of militaristic alternative school (without being able to go to my OWN hearing and present my case, and after being told that it was only to be six weeks).
So fast forward over a year. I'm out of school and I'm hitch-hiking around the country having a lot of fun. I get a call from my mom telling me I got a letter in the mail saying I missed a court date and that I've got a warrant. Grand. We never knew if the thing was ever resolved before that. I'd asked my dad to look in to it. He said he would, so I didn't worry about it. Well fine. I come back to Texas and get another letter saying I have a warrant. So my dad again says he'll take care of it. Then I get stopped by the cops (they're collecting warrants), and nothing comes up, so I figure I probably don't have a warrant. Then the Arlington Star Telegram publishes a list of warrants in my county. I'm not on the list. So a few days after New Years I get stopped by the cops again, and he tells me I DO have a warrant, so I looked up the number and gave the PD a call the day after that and found out that I can either serve my time (where each day usually is equal to $100), or I can give them the money. Great. The state practices extortion.
So why don't I just pay them? Well for the simple reason that I don't have $782.60. But, I do have ~$70, and will have more after I sell my television, my VCR, and my DVD player. I'm in the process of looking for a job. So, if you know where I might be able to snag a job, (or any other ideas to help me earn some cash), go ahead and drop me a line at donatetodave@gmail.com.
So in conclusion, this is why I'm asking you, my humble readers, for a donation of any size - so that I can stay out of the hands of the state and in the hands of my friends and family, with control over my life and without worrying about going outside. For an exciting stew of anarchism and poorly prepared XHTML and CSS, click here. Or there, rather.